It's all about sentence structure variation or it becomes something like water torture. Drip, drip, drip.
I always think it reads like a middle school essay, and I'd like to think my writing has matured past that... :)
I know what you're saying and the rational, intellectual part of me appreciates this detail of the game. The part of me that is a fangirl and stoopid in love with a character... that's another story.
:D
Good thing he breaks up with you in Act II and doesn't come back until after she dies. It makes the arguing about it much shorter. :)
Seriously, though, I can see her having a knock-down fight with her only remaining child about having mixed children.
Yesssss. It's actually an issue I thought about while writing "What Came After", and why they wound up in Rivain. Just considering the very real practicalities of where would they live? We've only seen one example of it in game, with Arianni and Feynriel, and it seemed pretty clear they were looked down on by both societies (not to mention deadbeat dad disavowing him). A human woman and a male elf living together happily? Especially one that is so derisive of both Dalish and Alienage cultures? They'd stick out in both societies, which is the last thing a mage-siding Hawke is going to want to do.
I know. I never, ever want to discourage someone from writing... but, it's so hard to explain that the level of brilliance to pull off a quality rehash is beyond most mortals.
That. Plus this game (as opposed to Assassin's Creed, which, granted, I've only dipped my toe into) is so open for players creating their own stories. We've played the games two, three, eighteen times, why would we want your take?
Not to mention that, let's be honest, the fandom is almost two years old and s/he's coming into it late and expressing no knowledge of what's been done before, as you implied. If all s/he's doing is a straight re-write of the game with no background in the fandom, odds are it's either going to be boring as hell or someone has done it before, either in fic or in their own playthrough.
I've only entertained doing a fic covering the game three times and have yet to execute on any of them: Origins with an f!Cousland with Ser Gilmore as a Companion/Alistair foil (based on the concept of the mod existing); Awakening as if Alistair was Warden-Commander (stemming off my head!canon m!Cousland playthrough); and a kmeme prompt I AM going to write someday, dammit, with the premise that the ogre kills Leandra and both twins survive the flight from Lothering.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2011-09-01 07:05 pm (UTC)I always think it reads like a middle school essay, and I'd like to think my writing has matured past that... :)
I know what you're saying and the rational, intellectual part of me appreciates this detail of the game. The part of me that is a fangirl and stoopid in love with a character... that's another story.
:D
Good thing he breaks up with you in Act II and doesn't come back until after she dies. It makes the arguing about it much shorter. :)
Seriously, though, I can see her having a knock-down fight with her only remaining child about having mixed children.
Yesssss. It's actually an issue I thought about while writing "What Came After", and why they wound up in Rivain. Just considering the very real practicalities of where would they live? We've only seen one example of it in game, with Arianni and Feynriel, and it seemed pretty clear they were looked down on by both societies (not to mention deadbeat dad disavowing him). A human woman and a male elf living together happily? Especially one that is so derisive of both Dalish and Alienage cultures? They'd stick out in both societies, which is the last thing a mage-siding Hawke is going to want to do.
I know. I never, ever want to discourage someone from writing... but, it's so hard to explain that the level of brilliance to pull off a quality rehash is beyond most mortals.
That. Plus this game (as opposed to Assassin's Creed, which, granted, I've only dipped my toe into) is so open for players creating their own stories. We've played the games two, three, eighteen times, why would we want your take?
Not to mention that, let's be honest, the fandom is almost two years old and s/he's coming into it late and expressing no knowledge of what's been done before, as you implied. If all s/he's doing is a straight re-write of the game with no background in the fandom, odds are it's either going to be boring as hell or someone has done it before, either in fic or in their own playthrough.
I've only entertained doing a fic covering the game three times and have yet to execute on any of them: Origins with an f!Cousland with Ser Gilmore as a Companion/Alistair foil (based on the concept of the mod existing); Awakening as if Alistair was Warden-Commander (stemming off my head!canon m!Cousland playthrough); and a kmeme prompt I AM going to write someday, dammit, with the premise that the ogre kills Leandra and both twins survive the flight from Lothering.